SOOOO I am attending a Charity Event/Gala/Souree/Extravaganza/Hick Kick! tonite. I am told that the attire is “Resort Casual”. I do not know what “Resort Casual” is.  My first thought was straw hat, leopard european bathing suit, and teva sandals.  That probably would not be appropriate considering I am told that my seat at the event is with Banking executives…oh the conversational topics!!!

I have settled on the above picture as my “Resort Casual” attire for this evening.  Lets review. Have you ever seen a Flamingo NOT at a resort?  I sure as shit have not.  They are always on vacation, man…what a fucking lifestyle. And talk about casual. Flamingo’s bleed cool.  Always standing on one leg. You know how casual you have to be to stand on one leg one not even care about balance?? REAL casual. Next meeting, date or party you are at, I dare you to try and stand on one leg and still be mr/ms cool. LIES. Impossible. You will be rocking back and forth…Totally not cas…Cas? oh dont worry about that. Its just short for casual. Im so CAS I cant event say the second syllable.